The Keepers Athenaeum

if i could close my eyes
and sleep through all time
i could forget this life
and leave it all behind
i’ve tried.
this life of mine
sheered my eyelids from my eyes
to watch in horror and pain
the agony and hate that remains
cursed until death.
hideous faces torment
loved familiarities suit to depress
a dream of good memories past
only a demented joke, a lifetime [...]

death soaked hands
stained.
face numb
no pain.
my world,
through rose coloured lens.
once clear,
but now
stained,
dark,
blood red.
a glimmer of hope
a sharp keen edge,
raised above my head
dropped and shattered with force and hate
over and over again,
now dull with death
and stained that dark deep red.
the screams still resinate
trapped in my mind.
was it yesterday?
today?
that i lost my mind?
lost all time
commited this crime.
in the [...]

emotion
less.
heart
less.
soul
less.
my eyes
focus not.
my brain
ponders, no more.
my body
motion
less.
stiff
is the rope.
brisk
is the breeze.
all ceases to exist
by my choosing
or choosing not.

cleaved
is my mind.
wrenched
is my soul.
my fingers caress
eager to invite
the sweetness
of life,
as i know it. tormented
trembling, facing ceratin death
i take what seems my last breath
my mind turns away
my body has stayed
closed are my eyes.
magnetized,
brain burning inside.
triumphant i arise!
body radiant with life!
alive!
for now

today is my day.
“my day” i said.
“whoever gets in my way is dead”
and with that i started my day…

look into my eyes and you will see
ache and agony
the animal that is me.
ravaged, ruptured, no soul to turn to.
my rage is my warmth
my will
it opens my eyes for each new day of drear
and closes them in despair