The Keepers Athenaeum

now what you see and
touch and
feel
its all an illusion
none of its real
life gone by watched
through a steel gate longing
to run with the wolves or
just once chase down and
eat anything that
moves
eventually gone mad crushed under the fact
that the gate only opens for
everyone else and when it opens for you
you become stretched thin on your tight leather [...]

this hollow feeling
this feeling of hopelessness
i balance suicide on a razor.
these feelings will be with me forever.
testament to the fact
that the world is weak
and i am strong.
testament that i am alive.
nobody knows this pain,
and if they did
they would buckle under the pressure
that i hold on a daily basis
that suffocates me in the darkness.
if you knew [...]

material posession doesnt matter.
image doesnt matter.
ill learn to forget both
hate matters.
love matters.
both have grown strong
within me
anger matters.
ill let it flourish inside.
ill erupt like a volcano
taking with me the world outside
ill learn to love
to hate.
ill feed off of misery
ill cry tears of joy
and laugh uncontrolably in my infinite sadness.
and the masses will run the rat race
and [...]

Religion is mans attempt to promote the belief of continuity after death and to fill the void and uncertainty left by the thought that maybe death is the end and life has no purpose. Religion justifies faith and death as a passage to immortality but only upon submission to the will of god and the [...]

this day at the cinema, unchecked by the ravages of time
a halloween candy bag full of delightfull images that are impossible to digest
that jam-pack to the point of explosion
a beautifull kaleidoscope of blistering light and glistening insides
this day at the cinema or days as it seems
years it might be, a lifetime im sure
cool and comfortable [...]

imagine a world gone mad
a world full of violence and chaos
hands around our brothers throats
our sisters screams die with the wind
atomic fist fights
plugged away aimlessly in the dark
with the press of a button
to illuminate with thermo search lights
searching for anything and everything in its path
an endless volley of
a blind tennis match with every stroke
comes dire [...]

inspiration drained through thoughts that dont exist
waking from a self induced burial
with eyes forcefully unglued, with eyes that wont stay closed, with eyes exhausting to dust.
inspiration floods with the draining of the soul
emotions flood with the waking day, with reality served on a hot plate
eat it or die. it burns the mouth and churns the [...]

your rules were meant to be broken and you know what?
they will
i been bruised and broken
but nothing can keep me down
fate keeps me up on top
and sometimes underneath
but when i wake up in the hospital
recovery is a small price to pay…
flying from up here
it all seems so small
everything seems so small.
ive learned what ive learned
and [...]

the fire in my brain burns so cold
the ice i get from glances unmet
puts a fire under my feet
and a rocket in my pocket
hang ten and hang loose
ill meet you on the bottom

go hide in your shadows
hide your head in shame
close your eyes and pray
it all goes away.
hide under your umbrella
full of holes…
your mind floods with the rain.
your tears flood the floor.
your blood stains the razor.
your ruptured veins scream for help.
give me your pale hand
ill walk you through
the shadows.
ill keep you safe from yourself,
from them
from the monster [...]

i feel your pain
i can see it in your eyes.
you tell me to forget you
i wont. i cant
hang on a little longer
keep reaching for me
everything will be alright
i dont exist without you
if you fall
im falling with you.
hold on a little while longer.
ill help you
chase the shadows away.
ill help you
open your eyes.
ill help you
wash your wounds.
dont [...]

here,
desease festers and spreads,
a cesspoll of vomit ive fallen into
vomit and infection.
down here i find its cause,
poor decaying souls,
rotting unchecked…
unchecked by themselves
or anyone else.
do they even care? does anyone care?
do they care about themselves and the plague theyve caused?
who knows…
all i know is that im in it now,
with them,
decaying…
trying to claw my way out before [...]

no mater how much i yell
my fists slamming down upon
the traffic that will still be here, i stop
i think to myself, were not going anywhere.
i put my mind in a better place
thoughts that bring a smile to my face
and forget it all.
ill tip a brew
for the ones we knew
and keep on truckin.
squinting at the shining [...]

throw a wrench in this mess
slow it down.
erase the stains of time
burn it down.
back it up a bit
kill the ones you hate
hold the ones you love
fuck everything in between.
know what i mean?
maybe so
maybe not
maybe its too late for you
too late for me…
cut out the piece of my mind
that shows me my memories.
cut out my eyes
to [...]

i want to end this boredom
i want to stop my spine from crawling
i want to rip it out
and smash it up
fuck the world
that means fuck you too
i want to fly to the moon
please dont get in my way
if you do, watch what happens
please pick me up off the floor
ill run until my heart explodes
or till [...]